the feeling of things ending // the stripping away of artifice

pale beige and green full of rust
and leading tones leaning
towards a terminal
sent me down a spiral

One hot summer day,
I was driving home from work
and I imagined
the car spontaneously falling
apart onto the road
all the screws and bolts popping out
the doors swinging off their hinges
the wheels spinning and bouncing away
as the frame grinds and sparks
against the concrete as I am

catapulted through the glass
breaking into shards and
the jigsaw pieces of my body ricochet
away from me until
everything is gone

and all of the foundations and
layers of asphalt are forcibly
stripped from the earth
until the buildings, my car, my body
are shattered and crumbled to nothing
and it all floats away into the atmosphere.
back to stardust.

- - -

so I set my self back in order
and kept driving.
I’m left hollow and shape-shifted but
grasping the wheel.
everything is turned around
until it’s back again
and again I’m feeling around
again with fingertips and tinnitus

gutter-rain collapsing on the concrete
balcony mildew growing in circles
mountain fog enveloping everything
the rain-slick road blushing in the intimacy
mimicking blinks and waves crashing
snow-melt and stone-rot
saturates the moss

terraced construction pools into
cupped hands with grit and glass
and scaffold vines marking the trail-head

flowers bloom against brick
coated with pollen and vandalism
springtime again.