the long winter

“It’s 3:30 on a gray afternoon 
late in November.  

The clouds hang low,          
​and rain taps on the roof

There is nothing to do but sit                                        
in the dingy hall, lost in revery (1)

That day the huge water drowned all voices until it seemed a kind of silence unbroken
By anything: A time unto itself and still; (2)

Time has acquired a stillness,
​the hour breathes
Over a wine jug, ”(3)
 
I try to feel alive,
“but as it is, I am simply conscious.”  (4)

“What you are struggling with,” said                                
The psychologist, “is
a continuous song, something like                                                           
a telephone’s tone. Nebulous, noncommitted,
unrelenting, pretending  
to give you messages it can’t deliver.”(5)



(1) “Regret” by Judy Kronenfeld
​(2) “River Sound Remembered” by W.S. Merwin
(3) “Still Life” by Gottfried Benn
(4) “Night Letter” by Billy Collins
(5) “What’s Wrong” by Landis Everson